West Ham United 25/26 relegation thread

[muskie]

Odds slashed from 5/1 to 7/2.

Watch this space.

I think we're fucked.

[Manuel]

We have a good record against Fulham and could arguable be called a bogey team of theirs, so there is that. Although I do remember they smashed us 5-0 there in Moyes' final season!

We are generally in better form than Tottenham so we should give them more of a game. Whether we can defend well enough to keep them at bay is the big doubt. Especially after defensive confidence took a pasting at Liverpool.

Sure, we can go there, just saying not-over confident. Apart from the late winner at Spurs we have only beaten promoted sides since early Nov. Silva fucking hates losing and will have them fired up under the lights.

[Come On You Irons]

We have a good record against Fulham and could arguable be called a bogey team of theirs, so there is that. Although I do remember they smashed us 5-0 there in Moyes' final season!

We are generally in better form than Tottenham so we should give them more of a game. Whether we can defend well enough to keep them at bay is the big doubt. Especially after defensive confidence took a pasting at Liverpool.

[Manuel]

Would be great to go into the break with a big win, but can't say I'm too confident though, unless someone can give a logical reason why we would go to Fulham and roll them over?

I think if Spurs lose at home to Palace on Thursday I will start believing that they are deep in the brown stuff and have fully imploded. Heard a loose rumour that they may even fire the hapless Croat.

[dealcanvey]

Opta now has us at 69% likely for relegation. An improvement on last week despite losing to Liverpool. 

A win tomorrow would change that stat even further! 

[southbankbornnbred]

Can someone give me a shout when you all stop talking about fucking goalkeepers??

Ag ag ag!

It's just another of our problems, Manny! There are too many.

[southbankbornnbred]

was Mads that bad at Anfield to cause such a bashing on here?   Van Dijk header dont think anyone could of done better.  3 of the other goals were deflections. 

Yes, he was abysmal. Watch the first three goals (including the half-cleared corner for the first). But don't watch the ball - watch our keeper. All from corners, and he never leaves his line. He's like a little boy lost and he spreads fear among his defenders. Watch the second goal and tell me what the fuck he's doing with Gomez.

He doesn't have a clue how to deal with physicality. And he's a keeper.

You can't have a goalkeeper like that in England. It's really not a coincidence that we have been so poor at dealing with set pieces when he's in the side. Everybody has seen it with their own eyes since he joined. We can't keep just hoping he'll get better. Put him in the stiffs and tell him he won't play in the first team until he learns how to cope with it.

The first one he maybe could have come from. But he didnt and we clear the ball.  Few phases later deflection and in. 

second one no keeper comes for that, and the fact he is battling with Gomez as Van Dijk heads it should mean he is interfering with play and offside given. 

Third one no keeper would ever come for that. Ball recycled and great finish, don't think too many complaints about the save. 

Then the final two goals are deflections again.  

I don't love the bloke, just don't see why such a pile on after Sat. 

He's stuck, frozen to his line on all three goals. His movement is poor, he can't clear even one defender out of his way (at one point, he actually grabs Gomez and can't see the ball because he's got his hands on the man in front of him). He doesn't know what he's doing at set pieces and he's terrified of physicality. If that's Ludo or Parkes, they attack at least one of those crosses - and the twat in front of him on the line gets a solid knee in the back as the keeper jumps for it. You've got to be brave, and you've got to be physical enough to clear players out of your way. Make the ball - or the line of vision - yours. Don't stand still and hide behind their players. His effort was non-existent.

[Manuel]

Can someone give me a shout when you all stop talking about fucking goalkeepers??

[Rossal]

was Mads that bad at Anfield to cause such a bashing on here?   Van Dijk header dont think anyone could of done better.  3 of the other goals were deflections. 

Yes, he was abysmal. Watch the first three goals (including the half-cleared corner for the first). But don't watch the ball - watch our keeper. All from corners, and he never leaves his line. He's like a little boy lost and he spreads fear among his defenders. Watch the second goal and tell me what the fuck he's doing with Gomez.

He doesn't have a clue how to deal with physicality. And he's a keeper.

You can't have a goalkeeper like that in England. It's really not a coincidence that we have been so poor at dealing with set pieces when he's in the side. Everybody has seen it with their own eyes since he joined. We can't keep just hoping he'll get better. Put him in the stiffs and tell him he won't play in the first team until he learns how to cope with it.

The first one he maybe could have come from. But he didnt and we clear the ball.  Few phases later deflection and in. 

second one no keeper comes for that, and the fact he is battling with Gomez as Van Dijk heads it should mean he is interfering with play and offside given. 

Third one no keeper would ever come for that. Ball recycled and great finish, don't think too many complaints about the save. 

Then the final two goals are deflections again.  

I don't love the bloke, just don't see why such a pile on after Sat. 

[Gank]

The reason we have a relegation thread is perfectly demonstrated by the fact that we are on it arguing over who is the shittest out of our two first choice goalkeepers, with very good arguments for each.

[Far Cough UKunt]

Isn't he supposed to be Viking? 

More like Viqueen.

[southbankbornnbred]

was Mads that bad at Anfield to cause such a bashing on here?   Van Dijk header dont think anyone could of done better.  3 of the other goals were deflections. 

Yes, he was abysmal. Watch the first three goals (including the half-cleared corner for the first). But don't watch the ball - watch our keeper. All from corners, and he never leaves his line. He's like a little boy lost and he spreads fear among his defenders. Watch the second goal and tell me what the fuck he's doing with Gomez.

He doesn't have a clue how to deal with physicality. And he's a keeper.

You can't have a goalkeeper like that in England. It's really not a coincidence that we have been so poor at dealing with set pieces when he's in the side. Everybody has seen it with their own eyes since he joined. We can't keep just hoping he'll get better. Put him in the stiffs and tell him he won't play in the first team until he learns how to cope with it.

[southbankbornnbred]

Honestly, I really don't know who the hell is doing our scouting at West Ham (actually, I think we all know ultimately!).

We are atrocious at scouting players and we have been for more than a decade. It's just wild scattergun bollocks. The first thing we need to do when somebody serious is running the club (in a about a century) is burn down the scouting/analysis rooms and rebuild them from scratch.

[Rossal]

was Mads that bad at Anfield to cause such a bashing on here?   Van Dijk header dont think anyone could of done better.  3 of the other goals were deflections. 

[eusebiovic]

On his day, Areola can be a very good shot-stopper which is no different to about 101 other goalkeepers.

Hermans Hermits looks good with his feet and distribution but he wasn't a priority for what was needed at the start of this season and I haven't seen him distinguish himself when it comes to shot-stopping.

Even at Leicester who were a poor team that conceded loads I don't recall him making many saves as you would expect from a half decent goalie with a lot to do each game.

Cheers! Plonker Potter

[southbankbornnbred]

“Hermanson I’ve grown to like more - a shot comes in and he collects better than Areola. He then distributes quickly to one of our players.”

None of that is enough to pick him over another keeper. It’s PotterThink - and we know how that ends. When signing a player, you start with the fundamentals of the position, not the Brucie Bonus extras.

A keeper needs reflexes, agility, strength and secure handling, plus concentration, composure, communication and resilience.

In England especially, they have to dominate crosses and set pieces in a direct, physical game - commanding crowded areas, claiming high balls and standing up to contact.

He’s out of his depth in almost all of that, bar perhaps his reflexes/agility. Picked for his feet, but unable to do the basics like command a cross. Teams target us at set pieces because they know he’s terrified and rooted to his line. And when he does come for the ball, he looks uncomfortable.

He’s simply not good enough. Another waste of money. I genuinely think he increases our chances of relegation.

[Come On You Irons]

Is it coincidence that we started the season abysmally conceding goals from basically every set piece against us with the midget in goal, and now we've put him back in again we've conceded a load more goals from fucking set pieces?

I don't want to see that t-rex armed little fuck in goal for us again, he's fucking useless. Yeah he's had a couple of clean sheets but they were games with fuck all to do. I think he's fucking hopeless and I want Areola and his stupid fucking hair back between the sticks rather than this fucking child sized scandi dickhead with stunted fucking arms and Jeremy Beadle hands. What the fuck is it he's supposed to be good at? It ain't goalkeeping I'll tell you that. Maybe he makes good fucking fish fingers or something, brings them to training and sells them out the back of his fucking Saab. 

You cunts? 

What I want to know is on what grounds was Hermanson Munster brought back. I’m not sure Areola had done anything seriously wrong for him to be dumped. 
btw, the Dane is nearly 6’2”. At that height he should be far more dominant in his 6 yard box

Are you joking? Areola was responsible for the defeat against Forest and also gifted Burnley a goal late in our win over them in November. Areola's distribution is also shocking.

Overall, they are two poor goalkeepers.

[BoleynGone]

fraser
you're such a wanker
shit my pants moments
does that suit your immature agenda

[fraser]

"huge anxiety issues" FMOB

[BoleynGone]

Gank
Disasi's attempt at blocking the last goal was pretty pathetic, he and Mavro were not quite a s dominant as other games.Disasi has been good,granted. AWB has been poor for a while. KWP needs to replace him.
As for Areola every time a shot reins in at him I have huge anxiety isssues with what he will do,most of the time he parries and uses his feet a lot more to clear. Thus no one Know's where the ball is going. He performs like it's the kind of playground football I use to play. The keeper makes  numerous saves,sometime great one's but the save often ends up in another scoring opportuntiy, another save,then the rebound is put in.
He's not a safe keeper. I doubt he would be the number one at any other club in the PL let's face it.
Hermanson I have grown to like more, a shot comes in  and he collects much better than Areola would. He then distributes quickly and to one of our players. often it's to Summerville and he creates something out of nothing. However he's not a big keeper,not tall enough or muscular to stand up to defenders better.His lack of reach is an issue. Overall we have 2 second choice keepers. I prefer Hermanson. Every game either could be dropped for the next game it seems. A couple of clean sheets for Hermanson has seen him keep the shirt. Nuno can't change the keeper for Fulham and then put Hermanson in for the Cup game,to much chopping around for the defence who will be on the edge again.

[Gank]

The reason Hermanson got a couple of clean sheets when he came back in is because we put Disasi in as well.

[Monsieur merde de cheval]

Is it coincidence that we started the season abysmally conceding goals from basically every set piece against us with the midget in goal, and now we've put him back in again we've conceded a load more goals from fucking set pieces?

I don't want to see that t-rex armed little fuck in goal for us again, he's fucking useless. Yeah he's had a couple of clean sheets but they were games with fuck all to do. I think he's fucking hopeless and I want Areola and his stupid fucking hair back between the sticks rather than this fucking child sized scandi dickhead with stunted fucking arms and Jeremy Beadle hands. What the fuck is it he's supposed to be good at? It ain't goalkeeping I'll tell you that. Maybe he makes good fucking fish fingers or something, brings them to training and sells them out the back of his fucking Saab. 

You cunts? 

What I want to know is on what grounds was Hermanson Munster brought back. I’m not sure Areola had done anything seriously wrong for him to be dumped. 
btw, the Dane is nearly 6’2”. At that height he should be far more dominant in his 6 yard box

If Herman is  6'2 I'm a shaggin a midget

[Monsieur merde de cheval]

Is it coincidence that we started the season abysmally conceding goals from basically every set piece against us with the midget in goal, and now we've put him back in again we've conceded a load more goals from fucking set pieces?

I don't want to see that t-rex armed little fuck in goal for us again, he's fucking useless. Yeah he's had a couple of clean sheets but they were games with fuck all to do. I think he's fucking hopeless and I want Areola and his stupid fucking hair back between the sticks rather than this fucking child sized scandi dickhead with stunted fucking arms and Jeremy Beadle hands. What the fuck is it he's supposed to be good at? It ain't goalkeeping I'll tell you that. Maybe he makes good fucking fish fingers or something, brings them to training and sells them out the back of his fucking Saab. 

You cunts? 


 

[Monsieur merde de cheval]

Is it coincidence that we started the season abysmally conceding goals from basically every set piece against us with the midget in goal, and now we've put him back in again we've conceded a load more goals from fucking set pieces?

I don't want to see that t-rex armed little fuck in goal for us again, he's fucking useless. Yeah he's had a couple of clean sheets but they were games with fuck all to do. I think he's fucking hopeless and I want Areola and his stupid fucking hair back between the sticks rather than this fucking child sized scandi dickhead with stunted fucking arms and Jeremy Beadle hands. What the fuck is it he's supposed to be good at? It ain't goalkeeping I'll tell you that. Maybe he makes good fucking fish fingers or something, brings them to training and sells them out the back of his fucking Saab. 

You cunts? 

What I want to know is on what grounds was Hermanson Munster brought back. I’m not sure Areola had done anything seriously wrong for him to be dumped. 
btw, the Dane is nearly 6’2”. At that height he should be far more dominant in his 6 yard box

Areola had been making some mistakes (Chelsea game he was poor), hence why he was dropped,  Hermanson had been playing well when he came back into the side and previous to the Liverpool game I thought he'd been much better on corners, coming out to punch it at least.  The defending all round on Saturday was pretty shambolic.  

LFC were proper shite..and still put 5 past a very laxadasical WHU...
Wan Basaka on that 3/4 th ?... Pathetic stuff.
A very strange performance overall.
But par for the course at Anfield .
The players better pulls their socks up for Fulham...



 

[Monsieur merde de cheval]

Is it coincidence that we started the season abysmally conceding goals from basically every set piece against us with the midget in goal, and now we've put him back in again we've conceded a load more goals from fucking set pieces?

I don't want to see that t-rex armed little fuck in goal for us again, he's fucking useless. Yeah he's had a couple of clean sheets but they were games with fuck all to do. I think he's fucking hopeless and I want Areola and his stupid fucking hair back between the sticks rather than this fucking child sized scandi dickhead with stunted fucking arms and Jeremy Beadle hands. What the fuck is it he's supposed to be good at? It ain't goalkeeping I'll tell you that. Maybe he makes good fucking fish fingers or something, brings them to training and sells them out the back of his fucking Saab. 

You cunts? 

What I want to know is on what grounds was Hermanson Munster brought back. I’m not sure Areola had done anything seriously wrong for him to be dumped. 
btw, the Dane is nearly 6’2”. At that height he should be far more dominant in his 6 yard box

He literally has shorter arms than the British Army

[Massive Attack]

Is it coincidence that we started the season abysmally conceding goals from basically every set piece against us with the midget in goal, and now we've put him back in again we've conceded a load more goals from fucking set pieces?

I don't want to see that t-rex armed little fuck in goal for us again, he's fucking useless. Yeah he's had a couple of clean sheets but they were games with fuck all to do. I think he's fucking hopeless and I want Areola and his stupid fucking hair back between the sticks rather than this fucking child sized scandi dickhead with stunted fucking arms and Jeremy Beadle hands. What the fuck is it he's supposed to be good at? It ain't goalkeeping I'll tell you that. Maybe he makes good fucking fish fingers or something, brings them to training and sells them out the back of his fucking Saab. 

You cunts? 

What I want to know is on what grounds was Hermanson Munster brought back. I’m not sure Areola had done anything seriously wrong for him to be dumped. 
btw, the Dane is nearly 6’2”. At that height he should be far more dominant in his 6 yard box

The defending all round on Saturday was pretty shambolic.  

Correct.